TAYLOR, reagan leanne

[reagan]

* reagan leanne taylor !


"your soul is haunting me and telling me that everything is fine but I wish I was dead every time i close my eyes it's like a dark paradise no one compares to you i'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side "

23 | CANDICE SWANEPOEL | HOPE HARBOR | STUDENT

i remember it all too well

basics
nickname(s) : Ray
date of birth : November 13th, 2012
sexual orientation : heterosexual
occupation : student

personality

INTELLIGENT - Although Reagan doesn't flaunt it around like it's something that is anyone business, but she is intelligent. She's not exactly genius level or anything, and she is often too bright for her own good - but Reagan can hold her own. She always gets top grades, and her level of trying never exceeds slightly below average. She's got one of the quickest mind in her family, although her brother isn't exactly dim either.
CURIOUS - She has a compulsive desire to investigate and learn. The unknown must be known, the confusing understood. If Reagan hears a noise in the dark or out of sight, smells something, sees a flash of light in the woods, hears a legend or rumor, etc. she will have an urge to investigate. This is of course not always very healthy for her. When it starts getting unhealthy, she starts over-analyzing everything there is to analyze about the situation/subject. She breaks it down into little bits and pieces.
STOIC - Although Reagan is a female, and she does have feelings, she tends to appear very cold to the outside world. She rarely shows feeling or passion in response to events especially in regard to pain and distress. It may be because since her dad left, and her brother, she's turned into a callous person. She sees emotions as weakness most of the time. There's only one person that can really bring her emotions out : Cohen.
MOODY - Reagan's mood can change in 4.5 seconds. She can go from being happy, to as angry as an Irish Man who just had his beer stolen, and then back to smiling. She has a quick temper, and she doesn't forgive easily after she feels as if she's been crossed once.
UNTRUSTING - There's really no explanation for how untrusting Reagan is. When her father left, she felt abandoned. When Phoenix left out of state, she felt abandoned. When Cohen left? She felt abandoned. It's really hard for her to open up and trust people, when she does finally trust someone she's as loyal as a person can be to them. She makes a great friend, and a bad enemy. Word of advice though, once that trust is broken, it's nearly impossible to ever get it back.



history
The typical, all-american family has always been a good thing. You know, the one that lives in that cute house on a corner block of the street, that attends church every Sunday, Mom's home early enough to make sure dinner's put on the table before Dad comes home from work? That's what Madelyn used to have, until everything came crashing down before her. When Madelyn was eleven, she woke up one morning to her father's things being gone and there being a note on the table for the family to wake up to. Other than the fighting she heard often at night when her parents thought she and her brother were sleeping, she thought things were okay. That was mostly because of her brother, Phoenix. Even though he was a year older than her, he shielded her, protected her, from the truth about their father; their broken family. After her father left, things got worse. Even though Phoenix did his best to keep Madelyn from knowing just how badly broken their mother was, there were times where he couldn't protect her from seeing it. There days where Madelyn would wake up and find that her mother hadn't even come home the night before, then there were days after school that Madelyn would come home to her mother passed out on the couch; the smell of liquor on her breath. Madelyn kept to herself, and pretended for her brother's sake that she was fine. Pretended there was at least one "fine" person in the family.

Eventually, her mother got into treatment. Her mother got help. Life became semi-normal again. Her mother became her mother again. Madelyn kept herself busy in school, made straight A's, played soccer, and she was on the cheerleading squad. She really didn't necessarily have the time for boyfriends - though she did flirt around. Flirting was pretty much as far as it got, though. That was, until she met Cohen. Cohen was a transfer student. He came in during the middle of her Sophomore year. He was gorgeous, kind hearted, funny, and just over all perfect in Madelyn's mind. Coincidentally, they had three classes together that year, and Cohen was on the football team. The two began talking, and they became practically inseparable. Eventually, people at school didn't think it was normal to see one without the other. The relationship and the emotions, it overtook Madelyn like a hurricane. For the first time since her father died, she was able to let someone in. She told him everything: her past, her hopes, her dreams. Eventually, he became a part of her dreams.

A year passed, and Cohen was still in her life. They were both Juniors and inseparable. Things were going great, and then Phoenix graduated from high school and got ready for College. You'd assume that Madelyn would be excited and happy that her brother, her protector, had been successful in High School and was going off to College. As it was, she was not. The college Phoenix had set out for - the college he had chosen, was in Illinois. The college was a little over 2,000 miles away. Madelyn felt like she was being abandoned - even though Cohen even tried convincing her she wasn't being abandoned by Phoenix, it still felt that way. As it got closer to Phoenix's leaving day, she distanced herself. She had a major attitude around him, and there were plenty of days where she didn't utter a word to him. When the day finally came for Phoenix to leave, Madelyn made up every excuse inside her mind for her not to be near the house. Like it always did, life went on. Cohen kept Madelyn going - as she had begun to feel lost without her brother being home. Madelyn became very angry towards Phoenix for leaving - and eventually that anger turned into emotions she bottled up inside. She focused on school. She focused on Cohen. She focused on her mother being normal. Just like she eventually felt about her dad, she didn't need Phoenix if he didn't need her. She wasn't going to beg someone to stay in her life.

Her senior year of high school came and went ; she and Cohen started at Aurora University in the fall after graduation. Instead of having the traditional dorm room, they decided to move in together. They both had jobs, and they knew what they could afford. It wasn't a fancy penthouse, or a house they owned, but the townhouse they picked out together became their home - the start of their future together. He was a pre-law student, and she was going for pre-med. Even though they had their own place together, they still spent weekends with her mom and vice versa. Madelyn's mother even joined the couple for dinner a few nights a week.

But, things started to go sour once again. The pressure of college began to build up, with both of them. They spent more time away from home, either with their study groups or in the library, and from each other. Right before Winter Break of Madelyn's Sophomore year, it really went sour. She was leaving the library - and as she was walking down the stairs outside.. she saw Cohen kissing another girl. A girl she knew to be in his study group. It was that moment that something broke inside Madelyn. She hadn't felt so much pain, so much anger, since her father left when she was eleven years old. She was heartbroken, betrayed. It felt as if her heart had been ripped out of her chest. Cohen tried convincing her it didn't happen like she saw it - he told her over and over again it didn't mean anything to him. Madelyn spent that winter break at her mother's house - away from Cohen. Halfway through the break, the two called things off. Then, right before school was back in session - Cohen informed her over email he had transferred to a school in Seattle.

With Madelyn's job as a receptionist for a Chiropractic clinic, she kept the townhouse. The place that was a symbol of their future together. The place they once both called home. Eventually, Madelyn was forced by her broken emotions to find a different place to live - she couldn't stand the memories. So, she let their home go, and she found herself a different one. As always, she threw herself into things that weren't revolved around what caused her heartache. She focused on school , she focused on her mom , she focused on new hobbies. The summer before her Junior year, she fell into the partying scene , bad. She didn't have one night stands or anything, but she did make out with several different guys . there were nights she'd get so plastered she could barely remember anything from the night before. One day, Madelyn woke up and looked in the mirror at herself - and she was sick to death of what was staring back at her. She decided to change, so she did.

She stopped the partying. She focused on school and the several different hobbies she picked up. She let her hair grow out for once. She changed her clothing style. She became a new person. As she did with her father and her brother leaving, she kept her emotions about Cohen bottled up deep inside of her. She vowed to never let someone get that close again - and so far it has worked for the girl. Is she happy? No. She is not happy at all. Now, she's in her senior year of college, she's one step closer to med school. Like always, she's been focusing on her school work and her job, instead of her emotions. Things are finally starting to boil over for her. Recently, two events happened that might've just been enough to push her over the edge. Cohen popped into town for a few days - and though she had heard rumors, she'd managed not to come in contact with him until his final day there. And of all places for her to run into him, it was at the same restHope Harbornt they went to for their first date. Oh, Madelyn remained civil the entire time they talked - not once did she get out of line. He left, and Madelyn's feelings resurfaced. So, she decided to spend a few days with her mother. She believed if she wasn't alone she wouldn't break down and do something crazy. She wasn't wrong on that point, but she was lying to herself if she really believed visiting her mother would bring her some kind of peace. Upon entering her mother's house, she found her mother passed out on the couch, liquor clear on her breath. Madelyn found a trash can full of empty liquor bottles. She had no choice except to make a phone call to her brother. She informed him of their mom's status, and that was that. That phone call must have done something for her brother, because a few days later, he came home. Madelyn's not counting on it being for good though. One thing she's learned over the past couple of years? People always leave.

shelby

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